Christmas bonuses

Christmas is extra special because At spends Christmas Eve here. The kids didn't want to go to the candlelight service at the UU (I guess that was always me), but they still enjoy getting their Christmas Eve pajamas, fuzzy socks, and ALL THE books.

Speaking of bonuses, I set out the gifts and cash bonuses for the trash collectors and mail deliverers this morning. In the past, our trash was collected by a team of two so I set out two of everything for them. But I guess the team has been reduced to just one person because only half the things had been taken when I went out later. I'm blown away by the uprightness of this! I would not have known or cared if they'd taken it all. People are just so amazing. (They're doing all the work and they deserve all the cash bonus; I plan to get the remainder to them next week.) 

Pic: Nu and At in their fuzzy pajamas. I'm proud of the old copy of Susan Faludi's Backlash I found for At and the copy of Michael Kimmel's Guyland I found for Nu. Classics both. 

colorful leftovers

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve! Today was just making sure everything was ready for tomorrow. Nu didn't have presents for everyone, so we went thrifting as we had missed all the craft bazaars and Nu doesn't like big box stores. 

I've gotten really tight-fisted about spending money on things, as extra money goes to GoFundMes and E-Sim top-ups. But spending money on celebrating community is a joyous loophole. Planning and coordinating an event is also a welcome distraction when I'm trying to fall asleep. Guests from Saturday's party shared pictures with me and it got me thinking back, and I thought I'd record my favorite parts for next time. 

Of course, it was because of all the people who came that it was a lovely afternoon. It was so great to see faraway friends from Grand Rapids, Midland, Alma, Manistee, Mt. Pleasant, Ann Arbor, Detroit, Flint, and more. By far, the best thing I did was use my quarterly massage budget to ask my therapist if she could be at the party to give guests mini massages. She was amazing and people loved it. (It sounds like I made a big sacrifice, but it's Christmas now and my birthday soon, and don't cry for me, Internet--I will probably have a massage budget again when my fam finds out.)

Table: I used a fuzzy green blanket someone had given me as a tablecloth (lol) and had to move some of the decorative elements off the table as people brought in so many cookies. I made the Christmas Toffee that Nance recommended. (Also, I can't say how much I respect and love Nance for not using the more common name for that snack.) By far, the prettiest thing I made was this hummus Christmas Wreath and it took all of five minutes (you can kind of see it at the far end of the table). I spent a good part of Friday bugging Big A and LB if my Christmas Tree goat cheese actually looked like a Christmas Tree (Big A: Kind of?" LB: "Sure, Maya"), so it was a relief the wreath immediately turned out like a wreath and I didn't have to bug anyone for validation.

Playlist: New this year was Finneas "Another Year" ("I don't believe that Jesus Christ was born to save me/That's an awful lot of pressure for a baby"), Charlie Puth "December 25th" (the beginning sounds so much like "Last Christmas!!"), and RuPaul "Hey Sis, It's Christmas" (If you want nontraditional interpretations of "gay" and "ho"). Not really Christmassy but wintery songs like Fleet Foxes "White Winter Hymnal" and my favorite British-American bands--Slade "Merry Xmas Everbody," The Pretenders "2000 Miles," John Lennon and Yoko Ono "Happy Xmas (War is Over)," and Lindsay Buckingham "Holiday Road'. Plus a bunch of Diana Ross, Aretha Franklin, Cher, Norah Jones, and Linus and Lucy suites from A Charlie Brown Christmas to round things off sweetly.

Pic: AS's photo.

roUGH and toUGH

Discussions from the annals of today's family chat:

Don't cross the picket line. Starbucks Union baristas are calling for customers to boycott Starbucks through the 24th as they strike for respectful negotiations and fair wages. (This is easy for me since I don't drink coffee and am notoriously [hilariously] intimidated by situations where I have to order in a line when people are waiting behind me.)

Social media realities. This was a shoddy book (I flipped through it) and a shoddier movie (probably). Still, now I have to pay attention to this million-dollar misogyny machine nonsense to review how P.R. can distort social reality. The guy developed a feminist reputation, despite being a predatory harasser and retaliatory creep and then hired a P.R. firm to flip the script on his co-star Blake Lively. The alarming part here is that she's more famous than he is, but he thought he could get away with it because... he's a guy? 

Pic: A really leaden day: gray skies, gray water, chilly temps. 

getting brighter

Some people might have thought the party was taking place around the cookies, the laughter and conversations, or the lovely massage therapist giving mini massages...  but the real action was on the floor where the babies and the puppies were finding each other and having conversations: "Doggie!" Ruff-ruff!" "Touch Doggie?" "puppy-kisses, puppy-kisses, tail-wags."

We didn't get to singing carols until really late into the evening, and I was quite taken aback by how easy it was to sing along to The Dysfunctional Family Christmas Songbook that JN brought. 

OM came in from Grand Rapids for the evening, and I showed her book to everyone so lots of people put it on their TBRs. Her rum balls were really boozy, and after everyone left, we could barely move and curled up with hot cocoa for a long, no-holds-barred chat.

I'm looking forward to the extra minutes of light and brightness as the earth hinges into solstice...

Pic: Max, Huckie, + toddler and baby feet... Perhaps Max and Huck have found some cookie crumbs from the Cookies and Cocktails party? (I hope it's not cocktails they're after!)

when we edit the beast

the sadness scratching out of the dirt of your body             like an animal           is gentle         is a gentleman     who says, after you       

I can only guess what you're after      what you think I'm after    our lives are short       you beg me to remember the risks

but I know we arrived dancing       even before we were born                    and even when dead we may     return with new things to say

____________

Pic: Backyard winter wonderland. I especially love how the snow erases all our landscaping mistakes and covers up our many unfinished projects...

Nu spent yesterday hoping today would NOT be declared a snow day since today was the last day before Christmas break and there were all sorts of fun activities planned at school. 

things 1 & 2

Friends, has everyone gotten their Flu and COVID vaccines? Big A is seeing an uptick in cases at the E.R. so it may be past time. I'm at two superspreader events this weekend and am hoping my immunity/luck holds.

Shamefully, I haven't gotten mine this year yet--I need two to three days to recover from the shots and the timing hasn't been right with travel to Arches at mid-term break and Greece at the start of winter break. I've promised myself that I'll get it right after Christmas. 

I've also determined to work on my sleep hygiene. In my defense, there are some mitigating circumstances such as A's nighttime job, my own anxiety, my hankering for quiet hours, etc. The overall appeals of health and wellness didn't work on me--I felt I could deal with fatigue, aches and pains, hair loss, wrinkles, and all that. But At's specific warning of dementia really shook me. If I could go to bed at midnight, or even 1:00 am, and get 4-6 hours of continuous sleep that would be an A+ improvement for now.

I'm just saying--once I get my sleep sorted, I'll have no bad habits at all. I will be so boring. 

Pic: Welcome Committee photo. (Too bad Welcome Committee photos are always blurry due to all the excitement and tail wagging.)

2/3 I am meandering; 2/3 a.m. meandering

I've heard that depression is worrying about the past, anxiety is worrying about the future, and happiness is living in the moment. 2/3 isn't so bad, right? 

I think I have anxiety and moments of happiness/joy. I feel fairly done with the past. And also really lucky to have escaped without major trauma given how naive and gullible I used to be. Big A and my sister, who know all the stuff I used to get up to, marvel at this all the time.

I think I get by because I am blessed in my family and friends--I couldn't wait till Friday's book club meeting to see L so I swung by for a chat and hugs (and also got roses because she'd been at the supermarket and they were on sale). Later, LV was in town to run errands and stayed for dinner and we dug out the tiny bottle of prosecco chilling in the fridge to celebrate his tenure. (It was perfect because Big A was working that night and couldn't drink, so LV and I could polish it off ourselves.)

Now it's 2:25 a.m.: Big A is at work; I'm wide awake. It could be worse, it could be 4:00 a.m., he could be home and we could be goofing off. Big A can sleep during the day to even things out, but I won't because my work happens during the day. 

At told me the other day that I'm going to get dementia if I don't get enough sleep. 

I worry about that. 

But then sometimes I think I'm channeling the spirit of my great-grandfather who, according to my mother, would wake in the middle of the night to light an oil lamp and write poems about Hanuman, the god he was passionately devoted to. 

I'm not as religious, but I write? Right?

Pic: Our Christmas tree in the light. Oof, we really are running out of space.