even the chipmunk does what it can...

One of my favorite bits in childhood retellings of the Ramayana is when Rama is building a bridge from the peninsular tip of India to Sri Lanka to rescue his partner Sita from Ravana who has kidnapped her. He has the help of his semi divine siblings and the Vanara army under the ace engineer and architect--Nala. But he also has the help of a little chipmunk who carries pebbles in its mouth to supplement the work of the huge army. Rama is so moved by the chipmunk's altruism, that he picks it up and gently strokes its back... and that's how the chipmunk got its stripes!

But the real point is that everyone does what they can to right a wrong. In fact, in some versions of the story, the chipmunk's pebbles cement the gaps between the giant boulders and are actually crucial to the structural stability of the bridge. I am reminded of this in so many ways. Two examples stand out for me today. One is StephLove putting her body on the line by protesting near the White House at the freezing of federal grants (the freeze has since been blocked by a federal judge). The other is a student who has been using their skill sets (English and Political Science) to annotate three significant executive grants so people can read and understand them more easily. 

Heroes. All the hearts. 

Pic: Huckie and Max, who clearly haven't eaten in days at the dinner table yesterday.

time after time

Time is remarkable. I was overwhelmed on Friday and the things I had to attend to seemed immense and insurmountable. Today, not only was I able to catch up to everything, but the things themselves could be despatched with a few breezy strokes of email... or so it seemed. Perhaps I've just punted everything to the near future? Time will tell, I suppose.

Anyway, it was busy, busy, busy. And part of that is pre-planning for my biennial travel abroad course to the U.K. And it's exciting and nerve-wracking. And some parts are icky. We're currently in the ticketing process, and I get to feel like a jerk asking people for their gender "as stated on their passports" like that has anything to do with anything. 

Pic: View from the bridge--this is the Red Cedar River frozen solid--people have been skating on it as the tracks show. Big A and I walked to breakfast to celebrate yesterday's anniversary this morning since he was working yesterday. That was quite apropos, because twenty years ago, we met up at a breakfast spot, and then walked across a bridge too.

“You have to act as if it were possible to radically transform the world. And you have to do it all the time.”

Angela Davis, whose birthday it is today, says we have to "act as if it were possible to radically transform the world.... and... do it all the time.” I'm ready.

It helps that so many others are doing great things. Amy Siskind has made a list of important pushbacks in the first week:

* 22 state attorneys general sue over birthright order. * Reagan appointed federal judge pauses birthright order, says it's unconstitutional. * GOP Sen. Mitch McConnell criticized Trump for pardoning Jan. 6 insurrectionists who assaulted law enforcement * Alaska GOP Sens. Murkowski and Sullivan criticize Trump for renaming Denali after McKinley who never stepped foot in their state *GOP Mike Rounds questions why Pompeo's security protection was taken away * GOP Shelly Caputo asks for clarification on disbursing funds from Biden-era IRA, which goes to builds road, bridges, etc in her state * ACLU sues the Trump regime to block expansion of "fast track" deportations. * DOGE is falling apart - Ramaswamy departs, and today Trump appointed DOGE counsel says he is leaving too * Sen. Warren and Rep. Jack Auchincloss calls for an investigation of Trump and Melania's digital coins * cryptocurrency players criticize them too, call Trump's moves "gritty and greedy" and of course heroine *Bishop Mariann Edgar Buddy calling out their misuse of the teachings Christianity to perpetrate cruelty.

Pic: From DeLisha Tapscott. I particularly love "Demand action that feeds your community's needs--not their agendas" and "Build connections that center joy and solidarity." Love.

somehow tomorrow (will be the twentieth anniversary of our first date)

I would believe anything 
that started with you

I--still--do  

sure as any day climbing 

for hours then coasting 

down, on time

inside the churn of memory

time is a secret waterfall 

of it all

the soft singing at breakfasts

battles opening voices

love closing eyes 

oh, how we've danced our way 

for twenty unwritten years 

now going away

with the magic suddenness of deer 

whose hoofprints are filling 

with blowing snow

_____________________

Pic: I moved to the living room as Nu has a sleepover in the rumpus room, but Max found me for our evening cuddle. 

I'm a breathless miracle

I've been describing this week as breathless. Even so,  not only am I not caught up, I'm behind on rec letters, editing tasks, household chores, emails, phone calls, and even texts. 

I guess the weekend is for catching up now.

And perhaps next week will be more reasonably paced.

Some of the breathlessness is sometimes literal as in an incipient anxiety attack. And that's not surprising given the onslaught of attacks from on high trying to erase every progressive win of the last fifty years. I want to push back with something bold and expansive, like the Black Panther Party's 10-point program, instead of simply reacting to what is being taken away. 

And also, I got LV into my favorite form of "distractification"--we're planning a post-Valentine's potluck in Feb together. Instead of agonizing over the latest developments, our recent texts have been about guest lists and menus instead. So when LV, who is an art prof, suggested we make "milagros" I thought it was a cocktail. But then he started talking about how miraculous it was and...  I mean... I like cocktails, but I thought calling one a miracle was a bit much. It turns out they are little symbolic votives--we're going to do a craft! 

Pic: That's not a pond, it's the river--and it's still frozen. I saw people walking across it late this evening.

small bridges

the world is burning      the stars are burning

                    how can we tell 

between catastrophe          and astral beauty 

                 it is no way to live

in my mother's eyes      there was always

                a waiting, waiting

and sometimes            she was more dead 

              than she feared I was

inside night's shadow         a solid darkness

               a series of searching
in impulsive skies     and a patient earth

                    or vice versa 

in drifts of memory       and burning snow 

               grainy as television 

I am important               I am impatient               

                find hope untidy

but keep it rooted        and learn to grow it

                    hearty although 

still watermarked         by tears and time

_______________

Pic: The puddle of napping puppies around my feet... I love how their paws are all entwined. (Max's head is off camera as he's flopped off the edge of the couch. The red haze is from the red and blue lights Nu likes to have on in the rumpus room.)

"Do something every day. That can be something small"

This reminder from Gabriel Valdez was immensely helpful to me today. I wish it were published somewhere, but it isn't, so I'm saving it here.

"Part of the feeling of helplessness right now is this idea that you don't know some big thing you can do. But why would you expect that from yourself? Do something every day. That can be something small - a call to an elected official, getting a friend to call an elected official for the first time. It can be getting in touch with a local charity or volunteer organization. It can be reaching out to someone you know is already doing work and seeing what they might need, in that work or as an ear to listen so that they can go back to that work refreshed.

I want to stress this: These are all things you know how to do. These are all easy things. Remarkably easy things. Do one every day.

Your job right now is not to do the big shit that changes things. A stone is not a mountain on its own. Your job is to do something small but measurable every day that ensures you are not the one being moved off your norms, that ensures you are connecting to community around you.

And yes kindness and yes hope, but god damn it, you don't wait for those things, you make them. A job to be done still needs to be done, regardless of the measurement of your hope. You feel hopeful. Make a call. Reach out. You don't feel hopeful. Make a call. Reach out.

Hope is not produced in a fugue state. Hope is not produced by thinking about producing hope. Hope is the result of action, small, large, doesn't matter. Just matters that you do it.

Kindness is not the result of feeling kind, it is the result of what you do that is kind. Do something kind. Do something hopeful. And then you will be kind and hopeful. That's how it works; it's the only way it works.

You can't identify what needs to be done next if you aren't doing the simple things that can be done now. None of us is in a state to feel we're ready. OK. What's that matter? If you're packing for a trip, you aren't magically ready. You put shit in a suitcase first. If you run a marathon, you aren't magically ready. You train, starting with the small stuff. None of us is ready, but we understand readiness in every other facet of life as the small steps that get us there.

Readiness requires doing the things directly in front of you that get you ready. That's the job of the moment. Do it, or you won't be ready for whatever the hell the job of the next moment is, and that's going to feel a lot shittier than anything we're feeling now.

Things need to be done. Many of them are easy. Do one every day."

__________________________

Pic: This herd of deer was my welcome committee when I got home today. I don't know what was so delicious right there on the driveway, but they didn't want to move. I get no respect.